Everyone’s different. That much is obvious. You won´t be liked by everybody and you ownñt like everybody, but here are some traits that tend to attract people towards you. These traits will make you more likeable and they will help you achieve your goals and the ultimate success in your career. However, I thought it would be useful to put down some general traits that generally attract people towards others – hopefully, this gives you some value.
If two people are looking directly at each other, they tend to mirror each other… like a… mirror. So… if you smile, there’s an increased 3546464% chance that they’ll smile back; at the very least, you are smiling at someone (e.g. someone you just met, or don’t know very well * ahem * like what happens ALL THE TIME at university or school) means that you are being friendly. Be the first to be friendly and you might just get a friendly response in return.
2. Try your best to focus on the other person, in more ways than one
You’ll probably know this from your own experience, that people appreciate when you remember things about them (like from previous conversations), as it implies that you were listening to the first time. And guess what? to show the person that you were paying attention to your second conversation you’ll have to pay attention to the first conversation with them. It’s been proven that when we focus more of our attention to learn something (no side-glancing at your phone people!) that we tend to learn it quicker! – that’s a tip that all your students can take to the bank ;).
3. Be consistent, be you
If you’re consistent in how you act, then other people will more likely know what to expect from you – rather than being unpredictable. Security breeds warmth. Although we all have bad and good days, the best way of being consistent is fairly simple to state – be genuine. It takes a greater energy toll for us to act like something we’re not rather than who we are; while we as humans try to improve our weaknesses there’s probably a bit of weird in all of us that we can’t change; if people tend to know what they’re getting when they talk to us, they can make a decision to stay or go; then you know if people truly like you for who you are, and that brings a warm and * fuzzy * feeling inside.
4. Use positive body language
Simple things like making eye contact, having a good posture, saying things with enthusiasm can make a difference; the adage that it’s not just what you say, but how you say it rings true. Ideally, have both: but 1 out of 2 is better than 0, right?
Hopefully, these ideas may be of use to someone out there; at the very least I hope this gets you thinking about how you can give out positivity to others around you. Even as I write this, I realize that these points are a good personal reminder.